Sunday, July 13, 2008

Meet Twisty

Because nothing exciting is going on in my life right now (except that I think I've caught Carsten's cold), I thought I'd point you in the direction of some of the blogs I've linked to on the side of the page. It's tricky, because some of them actually are funny ways to waste time, but others are hard-core feminist blogs. It's the latter category that I'm going to focus on this lovely Sunday morning.

Today I'd like to draw your attention to the "I Blame the Patriarchy" website. Twisty is my new favorite blogger, but her blog is sometimes hard for me to read (amazing, given the bra-burning, man-hating, fetus-eating feminist bitch that I am) because it forces me to accept aspects of the patriarchy that I've internalized. And I'd rather not face the fact that I'm willing to let myself be defined in these terms. Let's focus on two examples. One of my favorite posts is entitled "The New Virgin Menace" and in it Twisty points out that, in terms of sex "no matter what a woman does in this world, it’s the wrong fucking thing." Because no matter what, women are defined in terms of sex. Here, Twisty says it better.

That’s the thing about patriarchy. It does the defining, not you. That’s what makes it the dominant paradigm. You can abstain from sex, you can fuck your way across the universe, you can be a stone butch dyke with a utility belt, you can get your boobs amputated and your uterus ripped out, you can be sex-neutral in your own crackpot mind, you can be ugly or hawt, you can be the Democrats’ presidential nominee, you can even age out of desirability, but you will always be defined in terms of, and used according to, that which the dominant culture describes as your essence: sex.
Directly related is the concept of "femininity." This particular link relates to the marketing of a pink vodka bottle (wearing a skirt) in Russia. It's hard to choose a particular quote from this blog (so if you're interested, I recommend reading the whole thing), but I particularly enjoy this paragraph:

Behold the neat trick. First, you make women act like simpletons, broodmares, janitors, mannequins, and sex slaves before you grant them social approval. You call this behavior “femininity” and explain that it is their essential nature, and that any deviation from the program will be punished. Then you infantilize and ridicule the ones who get it right, and vilify and abuse the ones who get it wrong.

She goes on to discuss how marketing femininity to women has the "effect of diverting women’s income back to the male-dominated megatheocorporatocracy, while simultaneously reinforcing women’s investment in the bogus feminine identity.... Femininity — selling it, doing it, approving of it, pinking it, drinking it — is antifeminist, fool"

Initially, I read this, and was like "Yeah! Take that patriarchy!" and then I realized that I was talking to myself. I've bought the idea of femininity like everyone else. And I guess I've decided that I don't want to be vilified and abused for refusing to play along...so I try to walk the treacherous middle ground. Just feminine enough so that I don't threaten the patriarchal powers-that-be, but not too feminine that I'm no longer taken seriously.

2 comments:

anaeromyxo said...

There's so much to say...I'm crippled...I wish I were eloquent or knew the appropriate terminology. I feel so angry about all of this. And yet, I go along to get along because, my advisor (and everyone else) doesn't "like those people." (his words). I am super pissed about the whole "PMS" thing. Dah! I fucking hate when men talk about PMS. I fucking hate when anyone talks about it...for so...many...reasons. And have I brought up "Tech bitch syndrome" recently!?! My head is going to explode. I'm married to the enemy. I can't survive it! I'm reading this book called "Babyproof." I have to finish it before I know how much I hate it. I'll keep you updated. It's related. Just wait.

Anonymous said...

Although it seems a cliche at this "post-civil rights leftist (read as white)liberal guilt" moment in time we seem to all find ourselves in, I think the answer is not more guilt or self-blame, it is awareness. It is impossible to think we could avoid dominant ideology that shoves itself down our throat through advertisements, television and every other possible medium currently available. So unless you want to inflict yourself with permenant loss of hearing, sight, and all interaction with those who can also hear and see, there is no escape. But I am a firm believer that all is not hopeless. bell hooks says that we have to be engaged in the makings of revolution, not reform. Reform allows a few choice females (also read as white...or women like Condie who "act white") to be a part of patriarchy's elite. However, these reform movements make women parrots of Patriarchy's core capitalist belief system and allow status quo as far as mass ideology and treatment of women to continue. Revolution would completely change the way we view power...so power as not to mean dominion over someone, but to be creatively empowered. Most days as I study for exams to impress a power over me, I think this is a pie in the sky idea that is just too hard! (said with whine), but just because we haven't seen it yet or may not even be able to get our minds around that feeling we have in the pit of our stomachs ("this just does not feel right to me"), I think on our best days, awareness and discussion plants the seeds of revolution. Twisty reminds us that we have a lot of ground to cover, and if we want the feminist agenda to cease to come in incomplete waves, we must turn away from reform and look toward overhauling the way we think about relationships of power. And, sometimes anger is the best way to honestly evaluate our situation, not rational thinking or using guilt as excuse for productive action: "guilt and defensiveness are bricks in a wall against which we all flounder; they serve none of our futures" Audre Lorde

SP